Holding on to the Past

Published by: eXtasy Books

ISBN :978-1-55487-851-2

Page :140

Word Count :28884

Publication Date :2011-05-25

Heat Level :

Available Formats : Holding on to the Past (pdf) , Holding on to the Past (prc) , Holding on to the Past (epub) , Holding on to the Past (mobi)

Category : LGBTQIA+ Romance , Paranormal Romance , Romance

Product Code: 978-1-55487-851-2

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The vampire Sebastian fights to keep fears from his past at bay and his new family alive and safe.

With his one true love, Julian, at his side and a new son to look after, Sebastian’s grief-stricken past comes out of hiding to find him. As Julian and Nikolai struggle to understand what vampire life should be and strive to live a normal life, Sebastian fights with his demons to allow the freedoms they deserve. But with the queen’s band of chevaliers not quite under control and shadows lurking in the night, Sebastian’s fears escalate. Can Sebastian find the courage to let go and at the same time give Julian and Nikolai the protection they desperately need?

“Sebastian? Are you still there?” His father’s voice rang out through the phone speaker.

Coming back to the present, he brought the phone to his ear again. Anger wrapped around his grief, keeping it in check. “Yes, I’m here. It was Caesar, wasn’t it?” he spat.

“Yes. It seems they ambushed him in the Muir woods.”

He let his head fall upon the cold glass of the window. “There was no one with him?”

“I am afraid not. They promised to negotiate giving Ramon to us if he came alone. I know how much he wanted to catch Caesar for you.”

He pursed his lips. Emanuel’s voice rang out inside his head. Sebastian, we will find him. You have my word. Guilt tore through his heart. If only he hadn’t reacted so strongly to Emanuel’s failure to find Caesar. “Ramon is, is alive?” His voice wavered.

“We don’t know if that is true or if it’s a lie.”

“So his life was lost for nothing. And that bastard is responsible.” Even as his anger lodged heavy in his chest, tears pooled once again in his eyes.

There’s something else, fiu.” His father’s voice was low.

“What?” He couldn’t take much more. What other damage had Caesar done?

“They tortured him before they killed him, sliced off almost all of his skin.”

“Oh, God.” A tear raced down Sebastian’s cheek. Greif and remorse squeezed around his heart. My dear, dear Emanuel. You died because of me. He twisted his back around to the window and lay back on it. His gaze looked up at the dark ceiling. He blinked and another tear journeyed down his face.

“And he wrote a note on a piece of the skin they removed. It said, Julian is a Judas. He and his lover must die. Nikolai is mine.” His father took a deep inhale. “It is as we thought. You must tell Julian of the danger you are all in.”

“No, I cannot. He will seek Caesar out. He will put himself in danger.” Frustration and fear balled up inside him.

“Sebastian, this is not a request. It is an order.” His voice was firm.

“I cannot.” His voice broke. What should he do? If he complied, Julian would surely try to find Caesar. Another tear raced down his cheek.

“Sebastian?” Julian stood in the open doorway to the office.

Fear prickled up his spine. “I have to go.”

There’s something else, fiu.” His father’s voice was low.

“What?” He couldn’t take much more. What other damage had Caesar done?

“They tortured him before they killed him, sliced off almost all of his skin.”

“Oh, God.” A tear raced down Sebastian’s cheek. Greif and remorse squeezed around his heart. My dear, dear Emanuel. You died because of me. He twisted his back around to the window and lay back on it. His gaze looked up at the dark ceiling. He blinked and another tear journeyed down his face.

“And he wrote a note on a piece of the skin they removed. It said, Julian is a Judas. He and his lover must die. Nikolai is mine.” His father took a deep inhale. “It is as we thought. You must tell Julian of the danger you are all in.”

“No, I cannot. He will seek Caesar out. He will put himself in danger.” Frustration and fear balled up inside him.

“Sebastian, this is not a request. It is an order.” His voice was firm.

“I cannot.” His voice broke. What should he do? If he complied, Julian would surely try to find Caesar. Another tear raced down his cheek.

“Sebastian?” Julian stood in the open doorway to the office.

Fear prickled up his spine. “I have to go.”

“There’s something else, fiu.” His father’s voice was low.

“What?” He couldn’t take much more. What other damage had Caesar done?

“They tortured him before they killed him, sliced off almost all of his skin.”

“Oh, God.” A tear raced down Sebastian’s cheek. Greif and remorse squeezed around his heart. My dear, dear Emanuel. You died because of me. He twisted his back around to the window and lay back on it. His gaze looked up at the dark ceiling. He blinked and another tear journeyed down his face.

“And he wrote a note on a piece of the skin they removed. It said, Julian is a Judas. He and his lover must die. Nikolai is mine.” His father took a deep inhale. “It is as we thought. You must tell Julian of the danger you are all in.”

“No, I cannot. He will seek Caesar out. He will put himself in danger.” Frustration and fear balled up inside him.

“Sebastian, this is not a request. It is an order.” His voice was firm.

“I cannot.” His voice broke. What should he do? If he complied, Julian would surely try to find Caesar. Another tear raced down his cheek.

“Sebastian?” Julian stood in the open doorway to the office.

Fear prickled up his spine. “I have to go.”

“Sebast—”

With a click, he shut the phone off and dropped it into his front pocket. “How long have you been standing there?” He swiped at the wetness on his cheeks.

“Not long, I—” Julian walked closer to Sebastian. “What’s going on? Why are you so upset again?”

He glanced at the floor and back up at his lover. What could he say? “I uh, my um… It seems a very close friend of mine has died. That was my father.”

Anger lit up Julian’s eyes. In a low voice, he said, “It was Caesar, wasn’t it?”

“What? No, of course not.” He turned away from Julian, looking out the window. “Why would you say something like that?” Biting his lip, he fought back his emotions, attempting to mask the deceit.

“Why wouldn’t I? I know something’s going on, Sebastian. I know you’re keeping things from me. I can feel it.” Snatching Sebastian’s shoulder, Julian jerked him back around. “Look at me, Sebastian. Look at me and tell me what’s going on.”